To be a fishing millionaire

by Uncle Wes, September 19, 2005

As I sit here with a pile of bills getting ready to put them in a hat to see which ones will get paid this month, I find myself wondering what it would be like to have a million bucks. What would I do with it you ask? I can think of several things right off the top of my head, such as fishing all of the different trophy lakes in Washington and writing a story for each one to share with all of you.



I could develop a trophy fishery here in Whatcom County without any help and, above all, I could pay my bills. Here’s another thought. I could film each adventure and give you a birds eye view of the action. Now that would be exciting. I wouldn’t have to try to describe all of the beauty I encounter on my fishing adventures through my writing.



Now this raises the question of how could I make a million dollars. Well, maybe I could marry well and have a woman take care of me in the manner to which I would like to be accustomed. Naw, I tried that she just got richer.



I’ve got to think of how I could become a millionaire. I know, I could sell autographs for $100,000 apiece and I would only need to sign ten. No, I don’t think that would work.



What else could I come up with? How about starting a fund for making me a millionaire? I could call it “Make Uncle Wes the Fishing Millionaire.” Now that’s kind of catchy.



I could urge all of you to send a check to Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266. I heard of a guy doing that and, come to find out, for some reason it’s illegal. So I couldn’t ask you to send a check to Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266.



But wouldn’t it be nice for me if I could ask all of you to send a check to Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266.



Let’s see, what else could I come up with? Just sitting here thinking of all the lakes I could fish and not have to worry about how to pay my bills just makes my head spin.



Could you imagine having to go fishing everyday? Now, that would be a tough life. But you know I think I’m just the man to fill the bill. Too bad it’s illegal for me to ask you to send your checks to Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266.



I wonder what else I could come up with that would make it legal to have you send your checks to Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266. Perhaps I could form my own non-profit organization and call it “Educating Citizens On Washington Fishing and Camping.”



Maybe I should look into this further. Yes, an education show just might be the trick. Then I could fish year around, share my adventures, create a really terrific trophy fishery here, pay my bills and become a millionaire. That would be a dream come true. But until I investigate this further I will ask you not to send your checks to Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266.



But if any of you folks can think of a way that I can become a millionaire fisherman, please drop me a line at Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266. Until I find out if it’s legal for me to accept checks from you to make to make me a millionaire, hang onto your checks and don’t send them to Uncle Wes at PO Box 841, Maple Falls, Washington, 98266.


So until next time may the fish at the end of your line be the one of your dreams.

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